Achievement Attained

I went back and forth with myself on whether or not I wanted to say anything about this. I made a video, then I decided not to post it. Then I decided I could talk about it on my little blog because this is my space where I talk about whatever I want. Haters be damned.

So a while back I mentioned I was dealing with some health stuff, but it wasn’t anything bad. If you followed my old blog, you know that the year before I got pregnant with Aria I was diagnosed with full-blown diabetes. I had nothing going on in my life besides taking care of Vince and our dog, so I got myself SUPER healthy and I dropped a bunch of weight very quickly. (Which is probably why I ended up pregnant.)

I’ve always been a big believer that clean eating and exercise are all I needed to lose weight and be healthy. We don’t need magic shakes or potions! After I had Aria, any weight-loss thing I tried to do was more difficult to keep up with. It got to the point where nothing was working. So I gave up.

The last like 7 years, I came to terms with the fact that I was getting older. My body was growing and it had become what it was going to be – The body of a grown woman. I was okay with that. I accepted myself because I feel that growing old is a privilege that is not afforded to everyone. I had survived to see my 30’s! I decided not to conceal my gray hairs. I decided things like Botox and whatever fountain of youth surgeries are not for me. Besides, God had already granted me the privilege of being skinny in high school and college. You know, a time when your looks, youth, and vanity are currency. So I called it a win.

During the pandemic, my doctor let me know my diabetes was out of control. She wanted to get me on some meds, but I asked her to give me a chance to lose weight on my own. I joined an online program that helped me with meal prep and exercise. It was a great program, but it was VERY difficult for me to lose weight. My body just didn’t want to budge. I had lost 8 lbs in the time I previously would’ve lost 20 lbs! Then my doctor put me on Januvia. It did nothing for me! Well, it gave me the worst cough ever because that was a possible side effect. I didn’t take it anymore, and it took like 6 months for the cough to go away.

Well, last year that doctor left the clinic I would see her at. I could’ve followed her to the new place she was going, but I just didn’t want to deal with all the drama of switching my stuff. I found a new doctor at the same clinic, and he won me over immediately! He was just so cool, understanding, smart, and best of all, human. But this new doctor was also not about to play games with me. He flat out told me that if I was going to be his patient, I had to get my diabetes under control. (Bluh.) He suggested I get on a weight-loss injection. I REALLY didn’t want to, but I REALLY wanted him to be my doctor. Then he said, “You either get on one of these or you get on insulin. What’s it going to be?” Since I had been on insulin when I was pregnant, I already knew that was torture.

So I asked him what my options were. Honestly, I’d known people that were on Ozempic, but it was on a national shortage and difficult to find. Also, I’d heard so many horror stories about how they’d get so sick. It was working for them, but they’d be out for days being sick. He named off a few others and gave me some pros and cons. Then he named off one of them and said in studies it had shown to have the least side effects. I was like, “That one! That’s the one I want! What’d you say it’s called?” Doctor said, “Mounjaro.” Then he went on to tell me all the reasons he felt that one was probably the best for me. So we sent in all the paperwork and got it approved with my insurance.

I began the Mounjaro injections in September after my niece’s quinceañera. Honestly, I was very skeptical about this working. But, I kid you not, it started working the very first day I took it. I’d be lying if I said the journey has been easy. It’s been a roller coaster of emotions because I’ve never been through anything like this, and my life right now is such an ongoing battle with other stuff (sorry, not ready to go there yet either!). Seriously, being on these kinds of meds goes against everything I’ve ever believed in, so I was feeling that I was kind of betraying myself. But the truth is, I have seen real results, and I’ve been under the careful watch of my amazing doctor. He has been really good about explaining to me exactly how the meds work and has given me so much support whenever I felt whatever way.

So, the real reason for this post. I’m currently on week 41 of injections, and I have reached my medical goal weight (the goal my doctor and I agreed was good for my height, age, etc.) of 135 lbs. In September when I started, I was at 181 lbs. I would love to say it’s been all diet and exercise, but that’s not the case. I don’t really have time to do a good workout. And I don’t have the patience and dedication for clean eating right now. It’s all been the meds controlling my brain from eating junk because that’s what Mounjaro does (Here’s a good article.). Also, I’m not fighting it, and I’m letting the meds do their job. More importantly, my die-uh-bet-us is doing much better and my numbers are kickin’ arse. I’m still working on my own personal goal which is 131 lbs, because that will be 50 lbs lost. But I’m sure I’ll get there by the time I see my doctor again at the end of July.

Now, why haven’t I said anything about this all year? Well, because I don’t want to hear shit what anyone has to say about it. I don’t want to hear comments of “You look so good!” It just triggers my bad self conscience and makes me think, “So I looked like shit before and you just lied to me when you said I looked nice in my outfit?” Maybe that’s not the way to go about it, but that’s where I’m at. All my life, there was such an importance and urgency placed on me to be skinny. And I was there, in unhealthy ways, but I was there. Eventually I learned to say f**k off to all the horrible standards I was trying to reach to fit into other people’s boxes.

This is for me. This is a thing for myself. That’s why I haven’t said anything or been posting progress or before-and-after pics. I’m speaking about it now because maybe someone else is going through this kind of thing or thinking about it.

So, if you find yourself on this kind of journey, I see you. If you have anything negative to say, respectfully, go f**k yourself.